I need to drink enough so I don’t care about being blown apart on the Brussels metro

I need to drink enough so I don’t care about being blown apart on the Brussels metro. Will there EVER be another bomb on the Brussels metro? Probably not. But fear is always there isn’t it. Or if not fear, wariness. Am I more likely to get killed crossing the road than I am to be killed in a “terrorist” attack? Yes. Our fears are crazy, but undeniably powerful. In every social environment I always EXPECT rejection, so quite obviously I expect to be blown up every time I use the underground. But what to me is important is there are a lot of people who are cripplingly self-conscious, just to know we are not alone. There are lots of us who are cripplingly self-conscious. To be cripplingly self-conscious does not make you a bad person; in fact, the CONTRARY is true! All the most cripplingly self-conscious people are always, it seems to me, also the best, nicest, most likable people. So all strength to you, my comrades. There’s probably more of us self-conscious people than there are of the confident people, just you would never know it. You are not alone; so draw immense confidence from that. You are quite possibly even NORMAL. Just no one talks about it. Not many admit to it. I admit to it. Every time I open my front door and step outside, I feel almost cripplingly self-conscious and exposed. Like I have no skin on my body. But hyper-sensitivity is a blessing. It raises us to a HIGHER level. Makes us MORE alive. Realise your blessing. Realise the power this gives you. Reversal. It is all about reversal. Walk towards what scares you more & more and your nerves disappear. Embrace what you are afraid of, and your fear disappears. Your nerves and your fear are the greatest inborn electrical power of your life. More than electricity, they are the untapped nuclear power at the heart of you. Realise it, and start to use them for your power, instead of your fear. You too have a power—most memorable thing my psychotherapist ever said to me. You have a volcano deep inside you? Use it! You have crippling fears, nerves, self-consciousness—use them! Use them to FILL you with power. CONVERT them! It is all about reversal. All about conversion. Never about direct engagement with one’s jealous enemies. Undermine them more subtly. Always remember—when someone attacks you, then you have them where you want them. Now you have them in your pocket. Now you can play them like a piano. To be attacked, the greatest victory. To be attacked—means you are getting under their skin, and really bothering them. Great people never attack; only small people attack. So, carry on. More and more. Flaunt yourself in their faces, more and more. Don’t do it less; do it more.

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