A MIND COMPLETELY BITTEN BY THE SERPENT OF SEX "You may think that the Grand Tour is about politics, & culture, & art, and you would be quite right; but it is also about gambling, and drinking, and sex. Particularly sex."
Living with —— the worse thing was all my debt was because of giving all my money to our private landlord. At least now I can look at my debt and know this time it was all incurred on pleasure, and pretty much erotic pleasure at that. If you are going to go into debt, nothing better to go into debt over than erotic pleasure. But now I have to give consideration to the roof over my head, and my quality of life when I have to live alone again. I CAN have a wonderful quality of life, based purely on my excellent salary, if only it was not for the debt repayments taking it all away. So a period of sensibleness must ensue, while still allowing myself my occasional pleasures, like Brussels this month and Vienna at Christmas.
But of course as always I cannot be down on myself too much, all that debt was incurred on pleasure, and in particular travel, so was any of that money wasted? No, it was all spent on travel. And if I had all that money back again, I would just straightaway spend it all on travel again. So it is not like I wasted all the money on some terrible investment, or on something that then got stolen and lost. I spend it doing exactly the most important thing I want to spend money on. That money brought me the most fantastic sexual experiences with Adelina in Manhattan, Fortuna blonde, Manuela in Burggasse Peep, Amanda and Jackie in WSK, Andrea and Julia, and Inna and Lucy in Fifth Avenue, Maria in Pour Platin, Riccarda, Diana, Olga & Alla in Berlin etc etc etc. The only thing is for my safety and future harder life, I have to try to rein this in now. Rein it in for a while, just so I can go again. There is no point living like a monk and owing zero pounds and just carry on living like a monk till the day you die. I have to try to indulge as much of my pleasure as I can, while still young and fit and healthy (and single). I have to put all that pleasure in my bank, so when I am old and infirm at least I can look back and think well at least I did something, at least I travelled to some amazing places, and slept with some incredible women. That is why every penny of that debt is worth it. Not a single penny is wasted or do I regret. Yes, there have been some bad trips, but you never know until you get there. You have to keep spinning the roulette wheel to enjoy those occasional massive successes that live with you forever. The successes are of so much greater value than whatever they cost me in pure money terms. Adelina, Lucy, Andrea, Amanda, etc etc etc absolutely mind-blowing experiences. The highs that you remember for all your life. Important to reach a philosophical position on debt, as much as a practical management position on it.
It is amazing what a sexual pornotopia is out there, and which I am enjoying. To think I was there in the WSK cinema lobby while a completely naked Jackie stood there getting dressed. What pleasures I enjoy. Hahah and to think the little people laugh at me and try to make me feel ASHAMED of these delicious pleasures I enjoy. Hahahaha.
Max Wednesday, Thursday, Friday nights £123, just £41 a night! Eurofuckingstar though £234 !!!!! The hotel is as cheap as it can be. God, I love wearing my trousers without underwear. Feels so sexy. 0518 My —- only looked very slightly red, and my cock nice and swollen, thinking about that busty Russian girl I rescued from —— basement that time. Thinking of dropping in to see Luna later on way to work! God these trousers stink! Of sweat and cum. If I am going to get killed by the jihadis anyway might as well keep running up my debt and having as much pleasure as fast as I can before it happens. I now think there is a very good chance I will die in Brussels. If I am going to die then better I suppose? to die pursuing pleasure, pursuing Priapism. Oh check my pills!
As always the funny thing is the more people attack me (and Christ look at how smart they look; do they have no self awareness whatsoever?), the more girls show their quiet liking for me, and attraction to me. Just in the last month there is the black haired girl on train, and the blonde schoolgirl, both giving me penetrating looks regularly before we get off the train at ——-. And after —-, there is now the Romanian —– coming on to me. And as I lose weight, I am just going to become steadily more beautiful.
All their vicious desperate attacks on me from October 1998 onwards and I just came out of it stronger, and more beautiful, and more serene, that is quite a testament to me. And to think I then experience such pleasures in 2003, 2004, 2005, 2006.
It is amazing but the only girls I want to talk to now are the whores in Europe. No interest in any involvement with anybody else in London. Oh for the joy and lust of those old Berlin Stuttgarter Platz nights! This is what I crave. Pure pornographic pleasure. Pure trousers down around ankles cock out in a hot dark porn cinema pleasure. I AM looking forward to Berlin. Tonight I am making 164 euros, just like that. I love this job. KEEP MYSELF IN A STATE OF PURE BERLIN PRIAPIC PLEASURE ALL THE TIME. BIG COCK LIKE ON A STUTTGARTER PLATZ NIGHT. KEEP ALL MY TRIGGERS TO HAND. Let me buy clothes in Berlin too. From that vintage store! This run of 6 nights is earning me 939 euros. I am ——-‘s Lord Byron: the small people are all fascinated by me, while boiling in their fear, jealousy and loathing.